


LINGERING TOUCH

by nekonyoung



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, New love, past bokuaka - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:02:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25844014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nekonyoung/pseuds/nekonyoung
Summary: Just Akaashi Keiji discovering something new and magical.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Miya Osamu
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	LINGERING TOUCH

**Author's Note:**

> Wanted to write fluff earlier and so I did. 2 paragraphs in, I realized I haven't decided which pair to write about. Thought about it, and decided to present to you a rarepair :D
> 
> This is really short. I just wanted something cute for once :D

_**LINGERING TOUCH**_

He’s here again. A sturdy distraction of the emptiness creeping in from every corner of this dark room where I felt I belong to. A breath, a touch, a touch that leaves this phantom feeling I can never shake off. He’s here. Ever present, physical, solid. I could feel him in every shape and form and he makes sure that I do, and I thank him. The silence that was once deafening, is now filled with the steady beating of his heart and I feel him, so close, and so warm. I wish time would stop and he would stay. His arms enveloped me, our legs tangled with the silk sheets of my bed and he just laid still, the heaves of his chest the only movement he ever made. He’s here. He places a chaste kiss on the top of my head and I look up to him and he stared back at me. A faint glint in his eyes tells me everything I needed to know, he’s here, with me, and the whole world stood still.

I’m not quite sure how we ended up here, in a moment where we both felt so at peace with the silence that often times felt so deafening in the absence of his being. Maybe he noticed, with quiet glances that never once felt intrusive. Perhaps the lingering touches that sometimes felt like a call for help, begging, desperate, with gazes that could speak more than a thousand words ever could. Maybe he understood those, the way he understood my every posture, my every smile, every change of tone in my voice. Maybe it was the nights I spent in the bars just to feel some semblance of presence even if it was around strangers and too blurry faces I can’t make out of. And he was always there watching silently from behind the bar just watching me go from stranger to stranger. Since when did I become such an open book to his eyes?

“Osamu?” almost a faint whisper pass my lips and I wonder why I suddenly want to say his name but he just looks at me. His features soften as our eyes held each other, trapped in a whirlwind of questions and assurances and something I’m too afraid to name, and he smiles at me as if he understood my hesitance and just closed his eyes, and so did I.

_________________________________

_“Was I not enough, Koutaro?” Keiji pleaded, fingers tracing random shapes on the man’s hands and he pulls away. “You know that’s not it, Keiji.” He looks down, refusing to meet Keiji’s eyes, like all he wants in this moment is to run away and never look back. “We’re both striving for different things now and it feels like there’s no more room for the both of us to just continue on.” He shuts his eyes closed and Keiji could feel himself shaking, and the tears are threatening to come and just fighting against it with everything he’s got hurts his chest the longer they stay here but he needs to know. He needs to understand why and probably, he hopes to fix it._

_“I don’t want to hurt you. It was never my intention to, but no matter what I do, you always get hurt because of me.” Koutaro says, he touches the part where Keiji was holding just a minute ago. “Kou, you’re hurting me right now. How’s that any different?” the tears fell and Keiji just lets it fall and fall and he could feel the wetness on his neck all the way down to his shirt. “I love you and you love me, so why should we just give up? I still want to make this work, Kou, if you just let me.” Koutaro didn’t answer and Keiji was afraid to hear more but he swallowed his pride, along with the heavy lump forming on his throat and he begs some more. “It might be selfish of me to do this Keiji, but I just can’t bear seeing you constantly wait for me, even when you can’t understand things anymore you still try. You’ve always been enough for me, maybe more than what I deserve especially now that I’m hurting you like this but in the end, I just want you to sleep and wake up with that peaceful smile you used to have and it hurts but I know I can’t give that to you anymore.” It makes sense, Keiji thinks, that they both changed and the things that used to feel like peace and butterflies and warmth and love is now nothing but an empty shell they’re forcing themselves into. For so long, they’ve tried and deny as they might, there’s really nothing to go back to. Not a home, not the familiar warmth, nor each other’s voices can ever mend what’s already been breaking for so long now. Koutaro leaves first, along with his things, and Keiji was left there standing, staring at the empty spot Koutaro once stood in before he kissed him goodbye._

_Love can’t mend everything and Keiji needs to learn how to be okay with that from now on._

__________________________________¬

I could feel the sun’s warmth burning on my cheek making me shut my eyes tight and groan. I felt around with my arms and the empty space beside me felt like a hard slap from reality that of course, he’s going to leave. It’s the morning and he’ll most likely leave. I grabbed the nearby pillow and buried my face on it, it still smells awfully like Osamu and I squeeze the pillow as hard as I could, wishing that he was in its place instead. A few minutes later, I hear the door creak, heavy footsteps slowly approaching me trying not to disturb my sleep. I turned around and met his beautiful hazel eyes so close to my face. “You’re awake.” He states. His hair is still disheveled and all the color he once had used in high school (that pretty silver color he dyed his hair with to distinguish himself apart from his twin brother) have disappeared, replaced with his natural jet-black hair. His chest bare like it was last night as I listen to his heart beat and felt the soft heaves of his breath as he drifts off to his dreams. “I made breakfast.” He says again, his voice quiet and deep, like a river flowing steadily along a quiet forest. I bit my lip, willing for these thoughts to not spill, and in my head, I admit that he is beautiful. He might’ve gotten a clue, maybe because of the way my eyes studied him, or the hot flush forming in my cheeks, but he never said anything and just smiled.

Maybe it’s too early to tell, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew, I don’t want to let Miya Osamu go.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Twitter: @relifer_


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